What do you seek in a partner?
A few years after my divorce, I made a list of everything that I wanted from a future spouse. It took me time to realize that I was not realistic at all, that it would have taken me at least three partners to meet all my needs and basically I was very pretentious to believe that I deserved it. I finally realized that I needed a man who would help me to know myself better, to grow spiritually and with whom I could really learn to love.
This Age of Aquarius gives us the opportunity to practice unconditional love and live smart. Living together helps us achieve that goal. Living smart means recognizing that we are responsible for what happens to us, that is to say that we attract everything we need to evolve. If we attract people and circumstances that we don't like, the solution is not to get rid of what we dislike, but rather to become aware of what is within us that attracted it in the first place.
I met several couples that separated with respect and love when they felt they had learned everything there was to learn together. They remain good friends and continue to want what is best for each other.
We must learn to accept that our partner is different from us rather than have expectations and wanting to change them. That's how we learn to truly love. It's also good to keep in mind that what we dislike in our partner represents an aspect of ourselves that we don't accept in ourselves. Our partner is always a reflection of us. 100% of the time!
But I must clarify that it is what we ARE and not what we DO that is reflected. If you want to learn and grow with your partner, pay attention to what you accuse them of BEING.
If you think they are an extraordinary person, it is because you are too. If you think they are heartless and it bothers you, that means you don't accept yourself either when you see yourself as heartless. It doesn't mean that you really are heartless or that you are all of the time. Your ego is making you believe that you are heartless when you do (or don't do) certain things. The fact that it bothers you in other people is great because how else would you have discovered a part of you that you don't like?
If you want a nice loving relationship, be on the lookout for what you can learn about yourself whether it is positive or negative. So, instead of just looking at what the other gives you or doesn't give you, start realizing that you give the same.
With love,
Lise Bourbeau
